The Wanderer Returns

Well, its been a long haul, but I'm safely back home in Riverhead once again. It has been an absolutely fabulous trip, and ranks right up there in my personal top ten.

I still have a lot of gaps to fill in, to completely document the trip, and I will do that over the next week or two. I have also had a few requests for a hard copy version, so once this blog is complete, I intend to re-edit it into chronological order, and make it available to anyone who feels the need to put themselves through all this a second time. I'll most likely do it in PDF format, and / or printed out for those tree wastrels out there. If you would like a copy, let me know and I'll put you on my Christmas list. Thoughts on alternative electronic formats will also be entertained - I'm not a huge PDF fan, but it does seem to be the closest thing we have to a universally portable file format.

To bring things to a bit of a close for now, it's worth reflecting of the last couple of days. We pick up the story on my final morning in Los Angeles.

It wasn't a brilliant start to the day, as the cumulative effects of the last couple of weeks had definitely caught up on me, and I was feeling decidedly seedy and SOB. My last EconoLodge was also a bit of a disappointment - not only could I not get any Wi-Fi connectivity, but for the first time, I had not managed to secure a ground floor room with parking outside the front door, and for the first time in two weeks, I had to completely unload the car, and repack everything in preparation for the evening's flight - aaarrrrgggghhhhhh. Having said that, it was the biggest, and most nicely appointed room I had experienced at this chain, and also the cheapest - go figure!

Anyway, I had repacked over the course of the previous evening, and come checkout time, swallowed my pride and asked for help getting my bags down to the car. Most obliging they were too, and I happily tipped the petite young lady a fiver, whilst feeling slightly silly that she was able to sling my bags around with such apparent ease.

Then it was off to the nearest Starbucks for a decent coffee, and a bite and more importantly, a decent Wi-Fi connection to allow me to take care of business. Following that, Kermit and I cruised the last couple of miles to our shipping agent John, at Performance Imports in Orange.

I caught up with John no problem, and we had a chat about the logistics of shipping Kermit, my Blue Sky Design Electric Trike kit, and Kermit's new bumper covers back to New Zealand. The only other issue was that of making sure Kermit was in a good enough condition to pass the MAF inspection expected on arrival back home. John suggested a nearby wash'n'detail place close by, so off we went and despite running into a few challenges in translating 'clean the wheel wells' into Spanish when my Spanish is non-existent, I ended up with a hopefully acceptable result.

Then it was back to see John, take care of a bit of paperwork, hand over the keys, and wave good bye to the Green Machine.

I had initially envisaged catching a train from nearby Anaheim station into central LA, then catching a shuttle bus to LAX airport. I had more than ample time to do this, but the way I was feeling, a cab seemed like a sensible, if extravagant option. And so it proved - very sensible, but $113.50 extrvagant. Hell, its only money, right? And it got me there in good shape to deal with the nuttiness that is Transport Security in the 21st Century.

Even though I was some five hours ahead of my expected check-in time, there was no problem in getting checked in with Air New Zealand, and there was no queue to deal with at all. Being plugged into an O2 concentrator makes life interesting in this context, and I had staff on hand eager to help me manhandle my baggage through to the screening area, and the TSA (Transport Security Agency) guys didn't feel the need to open my bags after X-Raying them, so it was then through to the next step in the process.

Being not totally sure as to where to go next, I asked a loitering TSA chap for directions. He kindly escorted me through to the screening area, and deftly inserted me near the front of the priority queue normally reserved for Aircrew and Business Class passengers. Score one more for being 'visibly impaired'! Ha!

The next step involved the removal of one's outer garments, viz: coats & shoes, emptying ones pockets into a bin, and ensuring ones LAGs (liquids, Aerosols and Gels) were properly packaged and on display in the regulation one litre, resealable, clear plastic bag.

All this stuff, and all carry on baggage was then X-Rayed, and the great unwashed went through a metal dectector. I got more of the special treatment though because my O2 concentrator would have sent the metal detector berserk, so I got sidelined for a personal pat-down. It was actually quite a giggle, as the guy doing the job was quite apologetic, and talked through the whole process, including emphasising that he would only use the backs of his hands on any 'sensitive places'. Honestly, I could have had half a pound of Semtex wedged in my butt crack, and he wouldn't have found it, so I have to wonder about the effectiveness of the process. Mind you, he was probably well trained to monitor the disposition of his 'client', and I was totally relaxed about it. He even offered to put a screen up so no-one could see what was going on, but I told him not to bother - it was just one of those things that had to be done, and was no big deal.

He then took a special square of cloth, and went right over the O2 concentrator with it. In response to my query, he told me it would react to the presence of any explosives. No issues there, so it was off to reclaim my bits and pieces, and off into the relative freedom of the departure area.

At this stage I still had a good four and a half hours before my boarding call, so I had plenty of time to grab another cuppa and a late lunch at Starbucks, check my email again, and confirm the arrangements for my eventual collection in Auckland.

Hmmmmmm, still four hours to kill! I had a wander around the Duty Free shops, just browsing, as I had done all the shopping I intended to do, and didn't need any more stuff to lug along with me anyway. The next logical stop then, was the Route 66 cafe, a couple of protracted glasses of vino, some chicken nibbles, and a chance to read some more of the most interesting book on Oregon history presented to me by Bill Bates way back in Eugene.

I also got chatting to some fellow inmates. First up was a couple from Hawkes Bay, who were also heading home on NZ5. They picked up on my accent when I was trying to translate 'Cabernet Sauvignon' into Californian Spanglish. They were just on their way out, so that was a brief encounter, but I later had a really nice time talking to Chris & Kelly, a young couple from Chicago who were en route to Fiji to enjoy their honeymoon. So cute! I managed to scare the crap outa them by telling them about Fiji's coup culture, and was mildly surprised to hear their travel agent hadn't mentioned the latest goings on, and that these had obviously not made the news in the U.S. at all. I did reassure them that as they were going to Nadi, and outlying islands to the west, they would be about as far away from any potential action as they could be, and I do hope I didn't bum them out at all. They were both really nice, and I hope it all goes well for them.

Back on the Route 66 kick, I was having a quiet giggle to myself in the cafe, as I was wearing the Route 66 T shirt I had bought in Barstow, CA the day before. The place was covered in Route 66 memorabilia, including a bunch of maps, and I was quite chuffed that I had pretty much followed it through the westernmost five of the eight states it used to traverse. And in a Corvette! Cliched, maybe,? Fun, absolutely! Want to know more? Go here!

Eventually, it was time to board, and with a sense of Deja Vu, I found myself on what could well have been the same 777 as on the outbound leg, and in the same seat - 64C. I shut down my machine, plugged myself into Air NZ's concentrator and settled down for the next 12 (or was it 31?) hours.

Yes, the flight was scheduled for 12 hours odd, but with the time zone changes I lost the 19 hours gained on the way over, and in retribution for enjoying August 14th twice, I missed out on September 25th completely. Just as well I wasn't hanging out for the release of Halo 3, eh?

Another flight, another movie - this time Oceans 13, which was OK, but really signaled that stopping after 12 would have been a smart move. Supper was a very nice ham and cheese focaccia toastie accompanied by an equally nice Pinot Noir.

The next few hours were spent dozing on and off - in a surreal state of almost suspended animation - before being roused at 04:00 (or was it 09:00 yesterday) for breakfast.

We landed in Auckland quarter of an hour ahead of time, at 06:15 local time, after a very smooth flight. To my chagrin, I found myself pretty much seized up after the flight, and at the virtual insistence of the cabin crew, ended up being decanted into a wheelchair, and whisked through customs and immigration at an indecently fast rate. I had dutifully declared I was way over my duty free limit, but found myself a free man before I even had the chance to register that this hadn't been challenged, and consequently saved myself the $100 GST due on my new brass model of SR&RL locomotive #24. You ladies can keep your gold and diamonds - this is my idea of fine jewelry.

Here are a couple of stock photos, courtesy of Matt & Martha Sharp - half of the convention committee, really nice people - and proprietors of Train and Trooper, purveyors of all good things Maine 2 foot model related.

The model, and...

...the prototype.

So anyway, I'm back in Auckalofa, free and clear, and a good hour ahead of schedule. Fortunately, Ted and Jenny (my parents, who had left home at 04:00 to meet me - thank you!) were running ahead of time, and in due course they found me sitting waiting patiently in the arrival hall, reading granny Herald (our local, somewhat conservative daily newspaper).

After a heartfelt catch-up, we headed toward home, and had a good run through to Blossoms, a cafe just a few km from my home, and our rendezvous with Michelle, Dylan & Kieran. It sure was nice to see the rest of my immediate family, and this is also a good point to say a big 'Thank You' to Michelle for helping make this trip possible by supporting me, and being very willing to look after our boys the whole time I was away. Sounds kinda weird, but she would have to be the best ex-wife, yet still very good friend, a bloke could ask for.

We all enjoyed a very convivial brunch, complete with celebratory Lindy-Lou for Michelle and me (old habits die hard :-), and then had the traditional 'opening of the bags', with pressies all round. Everyone seemed pretty happy with my choices, which made me equally happy.

The boys are on holidays at the moment, and will be joining me for a week on Friday afternoon, but in the meantime they headed off with Michelle to give me a couple of days to recover, and Mum, Dad & I headed off to my home just down the road in Riverhead.

After a very quiet afternoon, and Chinese takeways for dinner, it was time for an early night, and the most blissful 12 hours of sleep I've enjoyed in a very long time. Nice to be back in my own bed, for sure.

This morning, we went off grocery shopping to stock up the larder for the coming onslaught, and then after a nice lunch of Salmon & Cream Cheese Bagels accompanied by Corona and Lime (so what if you've never met a Jewish Mexican, they do go well together :-), Mum and Dad went on their merry way back to Whitianga, leaving me to finish unpacking, start to catch up on the laundry, and then ... why of course, continue blogging, accompanied by Pink Floyd and Metallica played loud on my home brew HTPC - as I said awesome trip, but it sure is nice to be home!

Keep tuned in - the trip may be over, but there are plenty more gaps to fill in and stories to tell. If you have enjoyed riding along with me half as much as I've enjoyed telling you about it, well, I've probably enjoyed it twice as much as you!